we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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