I wish I only lived at night.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
When are your genitals available?
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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