SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
