It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
Randomize
