A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
