This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize