i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
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