Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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