yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
soo according to the calendar on my phone, I'm 5 minutes late to have sex with that guy from work. Apparently we planned this, I even set an alarm.
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I'm straight up riding in the back of my truck in a bean bag chair right now. Feet propped up and four loko in hand. Glorious.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
Randomize