But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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