Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
