I'm passing your future prison.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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