After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
