Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize