If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I feel like every car around me knows I'm driving in my snuggie
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
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