marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
He keeps bees of course he's weird
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
