Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
