I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
