Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
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