wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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