Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
