What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
