He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
ok first of all what the fuck
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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