so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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