Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
