We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Randomize