your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
Randomize
