We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
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