Sry I called you an 8
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
