Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize
