its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
