I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize
