Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Randomize
