you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Randomize
