I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize