butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
