just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Randomize
