her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
