Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
