are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
Randomize
