I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
FYI you just passed out mid-blow job. Consider this my letter of resignation.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize
