I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
The air was thick with penises
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
