How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
just tried to scoop ice cream with a steak knife. now in the emergency room with a the cab diver and the drag queen he picked up on the way. its gonna be a loooong day.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
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