That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
