I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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