when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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