I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Randomize
