If i come over, it means nothing
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
