Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
