Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize