i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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